Lots to do

My Dad pointed out to me that it had been a while since I made a blog entry and to be honest I had not even realised. The last couple of weeks have been busy and my mind has been filled with Visa extensions and getting all the paper work together. It's been filled with business stuff here in India and also getting paper work sorted. It's been filled with getting the last of the kids school work scanned and sent to teachers before the cut off date and it's been filled with getting ready for Christmas. I have not started any Christmas shopping for the kids yet, I am finding it hard to get into the mood with all the other things going on. It seems that as soon as we get one thing sorted we are then trying to find out how to do the next thing. It's just the way things are here and everything takes time and patience. My patience has been tested the last few days and I have to confess that I did not always react well :) and those closest to me copped it. I had hoped to have all our visa extension papers in before Christmas so that I could then not have it on my mind but I don't think that is going to happen now. We'll see. I feel really tired now and want to curl up and sleep for a week. I want to be the nice Mum and the nice wife again. The one who has time for everyone and can sit and read to the kids and make yummy dinners that don't need to be rushed and can be cooked out of love and not necessity. I want to be able to just sit and enjoy a movie without feeling guilty and thinking I should be doing some work. I want to sleep in on a Saturday morning and not feel like I have to get up and get going as soon as I am awake.

The funny thing is that I do not feel stressed about the outcome of our visa extension application but I am still bothered about getting everything ready for it. I find it frustrating to not be able to understand the forms we have to fill in. They are in English but I can't understand it because it is such proper English, lawyer talk.

And then I walk out into the street and a sniff the air again, I sit with DC eating kulfi on the side of the road and I watch the people pass us and I am reminded of why we are doing this. Why the difficulty is worth it. I go to buy rice and supplies from our local shop and I realise that I really love the shop owner, a Muslim man. I have a genuine love for him that warms my heart and I am thankful to him for reminding me why we are here. I hear the drums in the street and see the warm smiles of the Hindu's.
I do love this country and these people and maybe I keep needing to put that into perspective when I am driven crazy with filling out a million forms. A million forms and frustration of endless paperwork might just be what it takes to see these people in eternity.