It seems the time has come to bring this blog to a close. The yatra has come to an end. How do I feel about that? I would be lying if I said I was ok. I have many questions of why, what happened, where is God in all of this. I feel dreamless, scared to dream again. There is an unfulfilled void in me. My optimism seems far from me these days but my yatra (journey) has been a journey I would not change. I was not sure I would even write here again because I didn't want to end on a defeated note.
The one thing I learned on this journey is the importance of love and it seems to be the one thing people hurt us with most. When you love with all your heart you are bound to get hurt but it shouldn't stop us loving.
I am by nature loyal, I will be loyal even to the detriment of myself and so when others are dishonest or disloyal to me it cuts me to the bone but I will keep on loving them. I feel India was robbed from me through friends who betrayed my trust. But I must learn to trust again, to trust people and God. I need time to heal and time to grieve for what has been lost to me. I have forgiven but I still hurt.
So I end this yatra with a prayer for love.
"God, help me to love you with all my heart and to feel your love again. Help me to love those that have wronged me. Help me to love the life I have here and now. Help me to have a greater capacity to love those around me. Please increase my faith and fill me with hope. Help us all to love one another.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1Cor 13:13
